Between Greed and Grace: The Dilemma of Settling

Student:

Guruji, I have been tormented by two stories I heard in childhood. One of a man who accepted what life gave him first, and people said he lacked ambition. The other, of a boy who kept seeking the best corn, and ended up with nothing—people called him greedy.

Now, I don’t know whether to settle… or to keep searching.

Should I take what I have, or wait for what may never come?

Isn’t destiny about choosing what gives us peace—not necessarily what’s best?

Guruji:

Ah… You have stepped into the eternal riddle, my child. The paradox of choice, where too many roads can blind the traveler more than too few.

Let me tell you a tale from the Mahabharata, of Yudhishthira, the eldest Pandava.

When asked by the Yaksha,

“What is the greatest wonder?”,

Yudhishthira replied,

"Every day people die, yet those who live think they are immortal. That is the greatest wonder."

And in the same spirit, I say—people chase after choices as if the ‘best’ will save them, forgetting that peace comes not from the best, but from the rightly chosen.

Student:

But Guruji, how do I know what is rightly chosen? Is it not wise to aim higher? People say those who settle have no dreams, and those who keep searching are brave.

Guruji:

Let me ask you this—what is braver: to leap into a void in search of a star, or to plant your flag where the ground is fertile and make it heaven?

There is another tale, from the Upanishads.

A student asked the Rishi,

“What is freedom? To choose endlessly or to be content?”

The Rishi replied with a metaphor:

"A bee that hops from flower to flower chases fragrance,

But the one that dwells and drinks deeply makes honey."

The bee that keeps searching never builds a hive.

Student:

So are you saying I should settle, even if I feel there's more out there?

Guruji:

No, child. I am saying you must distinguish search from greed, and contentment from cowardice.

Your two childhood stories are not about settling or ambition. They are about awareness and intention.

Let me reframe them:

The man who stopped at the first thing perhaps knew something others didn’t—that peace isn’t always found in the chase.

The boy who searched the field endlessly lacked recognition of value when it arrived. In chasing ‘best’, he missed ‘better’.

There’s a Sanskrit verse:

“Santosham paramam sukham”

Contentment is the highest happiness.

But that doesn’t mean lethargy.

There’s also the verse:

“Udyamenahi sidhyanti karyani na manorathaihi”

Success comes from effort, not mere wishes.

Student:

So how do I know when to stop? When am I content and when am I giving up?

Guruji:

Ah, the heart of your question.

Let me tell you the story of Nachiketa from the Katha Upanishad.

When offered pleasures, riches, and long life, Nachiketa said to Yama (the god of death):

"Ephemeral are these, O Death… keep thy gifts."

He chose knowledge of the Self instead.

Nachiketa did not “settle”—nor did he greedily chase.

He chose what aligned with his soul’s calling.

That is not ambition. That is clarity.

You must ask yourself:

“Am I chasing something because I fear missing out,

or am I staying back because I fear effort?”

Either fear is unworthy of your soul.

Student:

But isn’t there risk either way?

Guruji:

Yes, and that is the dance of life. Every choice shuts a hundred doors. But the one you open must be entered fully.

A wise Tamil poet, Avvaiyar, once said:

“Katrathu kai mann alavu, kallathathu ulagalavu”

What you have learned is a handful; what you haven’t is the size of the world.

So do you keep running after the whole world? Or do you make your handful precious?

Student:

Then is destiny what we create, or what we accept?

Guruji:

Destiny, dear one, is neither fate nor ambition.

It is discernment—to know when a door is for you, and when it’s just decoration.

It is not in settling, nor in seeking blindly.

It is in the courage to say, “This is enough. And I will make this divine.”

Or the courage to say, “Not yet. My spirit has not arrived here.”

Student:

I think I understand now. The choice is not about “more” or “less”.

It’s about being aligned with what I truly value.

Guruji:

Exactly. When you pick a flower, don’t ask, “Could I have gotten a prettier one?”

Ask, “Will I water this with love, and will it bloom in my care?”

Even Lord Rama, when exiled to the forest, didn’t say, “Why not the throne?”

He said,

"Janani janmabhoomischa swargadapi gariyasi"

"Mother and motherland are greater than heaven."

He chose dharma, not comfort.

Student (smiling):

So I shall neither settle from fear nor search from greed.

I will choose with presence and make it sacred.

Guruji (blessing):

That, my child, is true freedom. Not in what you choose, but in how you carry it.

Let your choice be a garland—not a chain.